Idea's I'll never get round to making...

I wondered if I could make an army of Steam Tanks. Yes I could.

Inspiration is like lightning. It strikes and... um... hmm. Inspiration is like a morning without kids waking you up; welcome, unpredictable and not always something you can make the most of. Kind of like lightning.

The main thing is that sometimes I have great ideas good ideas alright ideas for AoS or 40k armies that I'll never get around to making. Rather than just letting them disappear into forgotten realms of the infinite mind I figured I'd list some here.

1. Idoneth Skykin - I'm actually doing this one to be fair. Rather than mounting them on Eel and Shark friends my Elves are mounted on Eagle friends. It's pretty cool.
2. Kharadron Underlords - If you have flying Elves then obviously you have submarine driving Dwarves in chunky diving suits. They search the seas for Mer-Gold and it's all very Jules Verne.
3. Tzaangor Airship Pirates - Polly wants a craker. Polly wants ALL the crackers. Honestly this was mostly me getting stuck in the idea of airships.
4. Freeguild Mole Machines - Like Steam tanks but they are mole machines. With Cities of Sigmar you can use the faction that lets you bring in flanking forces to have a couple of Mole Machines pop up.
5. Ork Hussars - Impressive trimmed coats, big hats and cool trikes with loads of dakka on.
6. Eldar Exodite Dune - They ride sandworms and that's about as far as I got with the idea.
7. Girls Und Panzer - Angler Fish team in a Leman Russ.
8. T'au cut off from supplies - I did I squad of them with bows and machetes as back up weapons and mostly helmets off as the batteries have run out. Would be amazing with jury rigged and barely functioning battlesuits.
9. Rococo Admech - Lots of, just, like, too much, too much.
10. Space Wolves riding Corgis

Cities of Sigmar - Review

Long awaited tome...

Age of Sigmar has been a setting of great mythology and epic scale since day one. Warriors from the Heavens, realms fallen to Chaotic Gods and landscapes formed by the feuding of gods. Until 'Shadows Over Hammerhal' we were starved of the more human aspect. Not to say it wasn't there but you had to search and extrapolate.

Cities of Sigmar has therefore been a long awaited tome. We get to see the hubs of civilisation the populace of Order is built upon which is the life blood of an interesting narrative. Mythology is great but best as a supplement to the reality of mortal existence in my opinion. More importantly, with so much of the narrative centered on the protection or destruction of mortal settlements, this tome returns agency to those mortals.

The Art

Starting with the cover this book has gorgeous artwork. That Greatsword has power and determination oozing from every pore. How many battles has he fought? What horrors has he witnessed? What inner turmoil has he conquered? The composition is superb and I don't know whether I should slide it onto the shelf or frame the book. Stunning.

Page 4-5 gives us a double spread of text and artwork that encapsulates mortal life. High up and towering over everything is the realm gate, centre of the city and won by the blood of angelic hosts. As we descend from the great stone edifices carved by the Lord Ordinators for the Stormcast Eternals to defend this prize we see architecture and statuary glorifying the God-Empor...errr... God King Sigmar. Finally the shadows of these epic bastions fall upon the urban sprawl of the mortal populace, slum dwellings that speak of over crowding and misery. The dirty truth of Sigmar's detachment from his worshipers.

I'm in danger of losing focus to analyse every bit of artwork. Suffice to say it's really great stuff.

The Setting

So it's worth clarifying that this tome covers major hubs of civilisation loyal to Sigmar. Mortals are found across the realms with Daughters of Khaine originating from the Gloomy Realm and Idoneth trusting it's better down where it's wetter. I think the Kharardron live in the metal place but I honestly don't give an airship about them. Even in Spoopy dead realm there are mortals. As such this isn't a definitive guide so much as a look at the places mortals can muster armies of epic scale at the behest of the God Em... King.

Hammerhal is our poster city. It's pretty cool as it spans Alarielles realm of life where the food grows and the Fire slayers realm of burny things where all the industry happens. At heart this an allegory of Britain's Industrial Revolution. On one hand the ever expanding industrial centre with a decaying heart, ever drawing in people to fuel its output and expansion with little care for them. On the other a constant life and death struggle between nature and the demands of a ravenous populace. 

As with the Industrial Revolution era Britain it mirrors, Hammerhal consumes everything and exports violence. There are martial academies to train generals and slums to provide a constant supply of recruits eager to escape poverty or prison. Throw in an unearned sense of superiority and jingoistic flair... you can almost hear the 'British Grenadiers' rising from the page. Meanwhile the Sylvaneth look on with an increasing sense of unease as this monstrosity encroaches further into their realm.

The Living City on the other hand is the ultimate treehouse. A super awesome stand in for Avalorn where the Wanderers can actually get along with the Sylvaneth (sort of). I love the living city more for what I read into it than what it actually offers I suspect. My biggest disappointment here is the little text box about the 'Everspring Swathe'; twin continents that segregate male and female flora and fauna who then migrate along a sex peninsula. That is some grade A bullshit I suspect will be ignored down the line. 

In a quick round up there is the smog covered hell of the Greywater Fastness that blights the realm of life; only tolerated because occasionally artillery is useful to have around. The Phoenicium where Elves get to be swotty swots away from Teclis the ultimate Incel; all whilst surrounded by an amber fog and phoenixes! Anvilgard the Pirate city with added seamonsters and weedkiller. Tempests Eye which is the seat of House Arryn and guardi... wait, wait, it's a mountain top trading port and observatory that has an inexplicable affinity for horses.

Finally I need to mention Hallowheart which promises loads of potential for modelling and storytelling. A huge crater with a massive basalt mesa in the middle. You can adventure from the towering heights where eagles and airships roost; right down to the mines where mortals dig too deep and too greedily. As if that wasn't enough it used to be the home to a Dragon of Living flame claimed by Tzeentch. An influence that hasn't entirely faded and permeates the populace with magic energy. I want to explore this place more and may well do so with my Idoneth Skykin army when it comes to painting.

The Rules

Hands up, I'm not the most rules focused of folk. Not in the Age of Sigmar at least given the increasing levels of complexity and detail the design team keep piling on. With this in mind I'm more impressed by fun or flavourful stuff.

Greywater Fastness is the big winner here. Extra range on their handguns, a 12" Aura that lets units run and shoot (ideal for a fast moving retinue) and an entire lore of magic based around Smog. That offers some cool army ideas right there. I get a real Napoleonic or WW1 vibe from this. Hammerhal is the damp squib given rules best suited for boosting their warscroll battalion of Demigrpyh knights. Worst offence being reference to Aventiss Firestrike, Sir 'Not Appearing in this Book.'

The Living City can blend with Sylvaneth and favours movement. I love it. Hard to play right but Eternal Guard flanking to sit on objectives is cool. Sisters of the Thorn can heal Treelords or shut down enemy movement with Thorn Cages whilst dashing about.

Pheonicium can really boost friendly morale and staying power whilst Anvilgard monsters can shred enemy morale. Hallowheart can have ALL the magic and an unshakable core, perfect for grizzled spell slayers and witch hunters. Tempest's Eye is seemingly dull until you factor in their ability to blend with Sky Dwarves. Then the ability to boost movement lets you keep up with the airships

Units

A quick one to end on. Glade Guard, Wood Elf Sorceresses, Empire Hunters and Cannon are missing. Actually loads of Dwarven artillery is also missing along with basically all the High Elves. There is a lot that needs letting go of in order to embrace this new tome. At the same time racial and factional keywording can cause your adjustment to trip over itself.

The units that made the cut are all visually appealing and fun to play. A lot of firm favourites here to work with. Unfortunately this also means we won't be seeing new releases for the cities anytime soon; this means they will remain predominately male presenting for the foreseeable future.

Rating 

Three and a half twin tailed comets out of five

The Purge

Sonne is growing up fast and needs his own room. As a result the wargames storage is being re-purposed for toddler sleeping and playing activities.

The Imperial Guard, Iron Jawz, Kroot, Tanks, Flames of War, Bolt Action, old Space Marines, Nids, Eldar and most incidental stuff has been looking for a new home. It's an emotionally draining experience but family before toys.

When the dust settles I'll be ploughing forward with Primaris, Gobbos, Skykin and Sister's. Oh, the American War of Independence (with my usual bias towards Pennsylvanian units) has survived the purge too.

Warcry!

New from Games Workshop we have the entirely playable yet unremarkable Warcry! Set in the Age of Sigmar, rival bands of chaos worshipers compete for renown. There is essentially one warband for each of the mortal realms; we have yet to see one for the realm of fire or the realm of heavens but I guess they will turn up? 

Stunning models

Games Workshop have really excelled themselves with the Warcry! sculpts. Reminiscent of Malifaux in their intricacy yet not as fiddly. Each of the six available so far are unique and characterful. Not sort of variations on a theme characterful but embracing their own style and inspirations. They also inspire greater variety and character, I have already seen the Corvus Cabal painted up as Parrot masks and sailors slops to create a piratical theme.

Whatever your style there will likely be something to work with. At first glance I was impressed but uninspired. Looking at the actual models changed that and I fell in love with the Splintered Fang.

The Splintered Fang

Hailing from the realm of life, the Splintered Fang are all about poisons and snakes. That's pretty epic in itself. There are so many snakes with beautiful colours to draw inspiration from. That alone isn't enough to draw me in.

Their aesthetic though. Oh my. Imagine a group of Greek Warriors fell into a Conan story as the villains then wound up battling in the Colosseum. Corinthian helms, scaled armour, mighty thews, Hellenistic styling, the trident and net of the Retiarius. Snakes abound and ornate weaponry speaks of the strange rituals of a serpent cult. Utterly, utterly beautiful.

A bit of conversion work

Out of the box there is a good variety of model options. I didn't want a variety, I wanted to stick to a theme. Exploring the idea of ritualised, gladiatorial combat I wanted a focus on shields and spears. My main battle line would be a Retiarius flanked by Hoplomaci.

The secondary line of juves couldn't take spears so I kept the theme with shields. This would mean sacrificing offensive capability for an increase in resilience, tactically questionable but a theme is a theme.

Bringing up the rear we have Snekboi who has a huge snek and throws darts at people. Alongside him we also have a slither of snakes, a little stabby dude and Mr. Big 'n' Stabby. I'd like to make Mr. Big 'n' Stabby fit the theme more but this model was just beautiful as is. I did stick one of the big snakes from Snekboi on his base though, then used blue stuff to copy the slither of snakes for Snekboi's base.

Next steps

I need to get these painted. My initial thought is to go for Bronze weapons, throw on a little verdigris, blend into the poison vials and snakes in green. When it comes to skin tones I'm in two minds about what to do. On one hand I want to evoke the wide range of Mediterranean skin, on the other hand doing them all as marble statues animated by veins of poison would look stunning if I can pull it off.

Regardless, if you need me I'll be looking at pictures of snakes.

Retroreview E2 - Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay

A Marxist Allegory

What is Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay? To the untrained eye it may appear a roleplaying game in the Old World. Nothing could be closer to the truth but look deeper. Within that truth is a hidden allegory. Coded within the pages of our favourite disaster simulator is pure Marxist propaganda.

For those who seize the means of character generation and define their own destiny; WHFRP is a chance to explore with choice and freedom a world of deprivation and horror. Never play with those kinds of entitled bourgeois gamers. Let the dice decide your fate and witness the full horrors of class based society and dead end careers.

Unlike Dungeons and Dragons wherein the gentrification of the adventuring class is laid bare; WHFRP doesn't shy away from placing the noble Elf scholar alongside the diseased and mutated Gong farmer. Whilst Call of Cthulhu allows players to slowly unfold the creeping horror around them; WHFRP considers such mind warping terrors mere background noise. Just like Capitalism. 

Our heroes assemble...

If you are lucky your career roll may throw up something with prospects like Rat Catcher or Pit Fighter. Oh the lucky git who starts with ranged weaponry in the form of a decent sling and rats for sustenance. Should that Rat Catcher survive the perils of the world to advance then a strong constitution, weapon skills and a eye for deadly traps will reflect their journey. Given the chance, a promising future as a Grave Robber for you and your Small yet vicious dog can be yours.

Unfortunately you rolled Scholar. You'll die within five minutes after being assaulted by a gang of rats, some drunk at the tavern will nick your 5D6 gold crowns and if you somehow live long enough for your knowledge of plants to be useful... the only career prospects involved customer service or going into increasingly dangerous places.

Maybe Jim will roll bet... oh great. He rolled a fucking Hypnotist. Of course he did. We are so screwed.

A Game, An experience

So what wonderful things will we be doing? Maybe when we've found a wizard to apprentice one of our number we can hurl fireballs? I mean we'd have to find a way to carry sulphur without stinking first. At this stage we also have a general Labourer following us around because that's what Emma rolled. I only mention our Labourer friend because some guy at the Tavern nicked my Gold Crowns; now Bob the Labourer is lording it over us with his packed lunch, prick.

Anyway there are rumours of strange goings on at the mill. We are wholly unqualified to investigate. We are wholly unqualified to do anything so we try anyway. A evening of asking around and I've misplaced my quill, some guy in the tavern has nicked the Hypnotist's silver charm and the packed lunch has been eaten. We are also led to believe strange lights inhabit the mill at midnight. It can't be any more dangerous than being in town.

To get to the mill without being seen we send the Labourer up a wall with a rope. The Labourer is by far our most skilled companion with the legendary 'scale sheer surfaces'. The Labourer should also have 'Consume Alcohol' but Emma never revealed how badly she rolled in character generation. Our drunk Labourer falls into the Reik and is never seen again. The splash alerts the lone Footpad standing guard, who proceeds to slit the throat of Jim's hypnotist whilst I leg it. Adventure Success! 1/3 survival rate!

In Summary

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay is one of the finest games ever written. Forget heroics, forget grand schemes and grander conspiracies. Grab some friends, grab some dice and spend an evening bouncing from one pathetic disaster to the next. Should you survive long enough to make a second session who knows what tragedy awaits? Fucking brilliant.

Rating

A resounding D4 Pots and Pans, D6 x 100 Pins, 3D6 small knives and D6 reels of coloured ribbon.

Praetogryns

A wonderful friend was having a clear out and kindly sent me some Warhammer Ogres. Seizing the opportunity I sliced the bodies up, added some plasticard spacers, abbreviated the bellies and threw some Ogryn bitz at what remained. 

That was ages ago. I now have two weeks away from my hobby space. Fortunately these were in a handy box along with my sculpting tools. Time for the 42nd Desert Grox to get their auxiliary support finished.

An Interview with Danie Ware

Once again I have had the privilege of interviewing one of the talented writers published by Black Library. Most exciting of all a talented writer exploring my all time favourite part of the Warhammer 40,000 universe; The Adepta Sororitas. 

Join me as I delve into the mind of veteran gamer, experienced writer and first woman to write for the Adepta Sororitas since their first appearance back in Rogue Trader. The immense badass Danie Ware...

As a veteran gamer and someone used to clanking around a battlefield in metal; how do you use this experience in your writing? When we read about the Sisters of Battle striding across the battlefield are we reading about your own exploits?

Yes and no – it doesn’t really translate directly, but it does come across in a more visceral sense. If you’ve ever been in the middle of a re-enactment battle, it’s all clatter and shout and noise and dust, and getting pushed off your feet, and its all about the speed of your reactions and how fast you can react to incoming blows. Sometimes it’s pure instinct, you don’t even see them.

For the Sisters, though, I fell back on the years I spent in the Cadets, running around with an old .303, and then in the TA while I was at Uni. That’s the experience that has really come across in writing Augusta and her squad, and the thing that has stood me in good stead. I know what that’s like, what the commands are and how you react to them. Funny how these youthful experiences have come in so useful, so much later in my life!

We first had the privilege of reading your work with Black Library in the short story ‘Mercy’ and ‘The Bloodied Rose’ Novella. How does it feel to explore the Adepta Sororitas further in the upcoming ‘Wreck and Ruin’? 

I’ve had a huge amount fun writing all the fighting and the singing and the stomping confrontations – so in Wreck and Ruin, I wanted to take Augusta and her squad in a new direction, and let them face something a little more subtle and complex. The story tears Augusta between her strict code of discipline, and defying that discipline to do what she feels is right. 

I don’t want to say any more without giving away major spoilers, but it’s less of a dungeonbash and more of a tale of wit and wariness, and of working out who the bad guys really are.

Previously the Sisters of Battle have been explored by James Swallow and the tales of Sister Miriya. Did these books serve as a foundation for your characterisation of the Sisterhood? Was there anything you set out to alter and update?

Absolutely, James’s books have been chapter and verse, to coin an appropriate phrase. I’d read them both anyway, but when I started research for Augusta properly, I went though them like they were ‘A’ level texts, literally line by line with a highlighter pen, making extensive notes about background, terminology, phaseology, everything I could think of. There are places where I’ve taken Sororitas combat-tactics, lessons or prayers verbatim from things that James had already written – and I’ve felt that the continuity has been important.

Because of the Cadet/TA experiences, mentioned above, the thing I changed was the focus on squad, rather than on individual. James’s books are very much about Miriya and Verity, and I wanted to use traditional military tactics to emphasise the squad’s discipline and manoeuvring, their interdependence and their combat-cohesion. Augusta, obviously, stays front and centre, but I likewise wanted to make sure that each of the other Sisters was a character in her own right. (I might have had ‘Aliens; in my head, at this point). This is why I chose to take a different Order – to make the stronger military structure a feature of The Bloody Rose.

The last choice was to make Augusta older – she’s in her mid-to late forties, and (I hope) that her age and experience come across in her character, in how she operates in the field, and in how she treats the rest of her squad. And I rather like the idea that The Sisters of Battle can be all ages, as long as they’re competent enough to survive!

What part of writing for Black Library has bought you the most joy or excitement?

Having been a war/gamer for much of my life, its been a lot fun getting to do my hobby professionally – and any author gets a wonderful kick out of seeing their books really happen, seeing their characters come to life for cover art and audio book. 

The thing that’s really struck me, though, has been the feeling of community. The Black Library Weekender was very different to any other SFF book Con I have ever been to, because it had real, dedicated fans – and they’re deeply passionate about the hobby, about the mythology and the fiction, and about everything that goes with them. It was a real treat to feel like a part of that big family, and that feeling has spilled out into my Social Media streams, and it remains very strong.

As an experienced writer and veteran of the hobby, what would you like to change or add to the Warhammer 40,000 universe?

STOP THE RIDICULOUS BLOODY BOOB ARMOUR!!! I know it’s all silly, and I know the boob armour isn’t really any sillier than anything else, and I know that it sells figures... but it’s one of those things that really bugs me. I’ve worn full armour, I’ve seen ladies of curve in full armour, and no woman has two huge and prominent half-globes stuck on her chest...

Seriously, though, I’m very glad to see more women in the hobby – more lady gamers, lady wargamers, lady painters and modellers. I’ve flown the flag for lady geeks since I first started playing D&D in 1988, since I first wore armour on the Vike battlefield in the early 90s, and I’m very happy to encourage more women to come and find out what it’s all about!

Bio:

Danie Ware is a single working Mum with long-held interests in role-playing, re-enactment, vinyl art toys and personal fitness. She went to an all-boys' public school, gained an English degree from UEA, and spent most of her twenties clobbering her friends with an assortment of steel cutlery. These days, she juggles writing books and raising a teenager with working for Forbidden Planet (London) Ltd. In those rare times when she's not writing, working, or on manoeuvres with her son, she usually falls over exhausted.

Danie is the author of the critically acclaimed Ecko series, published by Titan Books and Children of Artifice, an urban fairy story, published by Fox Spirit Books. She writes Sisters of Battle for the Black Library, and Judge Anderson for Rebellion Publishing, and she has had short stories published in numerous anthologies. She lives in Carshalton, south London, with her son and two cats. You can find her online at danieware.com or @danacea.